I can laugh at myself. I give you permission to laugh at me also.

Damn, another blog so soon.  I'm on a roll!

Life is good.  My family is happy.  If they aren't, I bet they won't say it to my face.  Just being real folks but I'm pretty sure they have no complaints...

I don't want to complain.  But then I open my mouth and speak.  I've been focusing more positive energy on crocheting lately.  I can work the yarn and see what I've produced.  It's better than watching television to pass the time.  My creations have often left something to be desired.  Just like the horse shoe scarf.

It's not what I expected in the end but I had a good time making it and learned a valuable lesson.  Counting is a must when it comes to crochet.  My daughter suggested I use if for public toilets.  I suggested she shut up.  All is well that ends well. 

Then the idea to make a flower came to me.  Not just a flower but a pot holder with a flower.  Completely useless.  I did learn a lot when I made it.  I learned that I really need to work on my crochet. 

I eventually got better after practice, practice, practice and made a HUGE blanket.  I was working on it at Christmas.  I had taken the part I worked on to Alabama to show my grandmother.  I told her when I finished, I'd give it to her.  Her words to me were..."I sure hope I live to see it."  I said, "I know I crochet slow but I will not be defeated by this blanket!" 

Well, I finished it like two months later and it's so big that I think it'll be easier and cheaper to drive it to her than mail it.  It's not my fault.  Maybe it is.  I just thought the pattern didn't seem big enough so I added to it.  She's still alive. I swear I have 10+ skeins in it.  (That's the term for the yarn you buy). 

Sometimes I say in my head...Skein, skein, skein, skein.  To the window to the wall...but I digress. I worked two yarns at once to make this beautifully blended blanket.  It's sits about two feet from me.  I'm a horrible granddaughter.

I ended up making some pretty cool stuff and selling some things.  Then I discovered the fine art of  amigurumi.  Well, my first piece turned out like this...

It's supposed to be a rat...


Well, I guess I'll keep on my trying.  Maybe I'll just crochet an animal with legs. 

Did your parents not love you enough to teach you these things or do you just not care?

I like to give tips to just give people a heads up on thinking about their actions, prior to acting on them.  I mean, I know the title may sound harsh but I see it this way:

1. You weren't raised well.
2. If you were raised well, you took as serious detour along the way.
3. Maybe common sense isn't as common as we think it is. 
4. I'm at a blank.  Sometimes, there is no excuse for stupid and it should hurt.

I want to start of by reminding all adults that some things aren't appropriate in public. 

• Please do not make out in public.  Please.  I bet, as an adult, you have a home to do this in or find another place besides standing in front of me at Kroger while I'm in line.  You can show affection by holding hands, having your arms around each other but don't suck each others face in front of me.  You are gross and have no manners.  Obviously, you weren't taught what proper public behavior is all about.
• PJ's   For the love of everything holy that you believe in, STOP wearing those in public.  What the hell?  Pajama pants and sometimes be passed off as just non-noticeable pants UNLESS they have snowflakes, cartoon characters and crazy designs on them.  One day, I saw a young man in complete pajamas.  Flannel, plaid, button up top and all.  To me, that screams, "I'm too damn lazy to find real clothes to present myself in public with."  Maybe I just take it too seriously but what examples are we teaching children, not just our own but others, when they see adults too lazy to wear such things. 
• Please be aware of what you say while talking on your cell phone in public.  I know I've been over this before.  Chances are, if I already question your stupidity, this confirms it.  Tonight I heard, 'Damn that light skinned bitch.  She dumb. Who she think she is?'   Wow.  Black on black racism.   Well, black on light skinned bitches racism.  I don't talk about white women by saying, "Damn that tanned skinned bitch.  I do find her intelligence quite questionable."  (To some that may sound racist, to me I have to say, get over it.  Everyone is racist and if you say you are not, you are lying.) Holy hell, I could go on about this and the countless comedians that make jokes about the way white people speak and behave but I digress...I'm not mad at them.  White folks are fucking funny sometimes.  (Case in point:  Jerry Springer's guests)
• Let's as adults all become responsible for, how should I say...being adults.  If you have to update paperwork once a year in your doctor's office, get over it.  Really, the office doesn't care if your information hasn't changed.  The office doesn't care if you get upset.  It's the doctor's ass on the line if you don't read and sign the paperwork.  It's not even anything out of the norm.  It's just plain basic common sense. However, our society is so litigious, (google it if you don't understand it), to let one tiny bit of information pass by you without your knowledge. If you sign it, you understand it.  If you refuse, well depending on what you refused, you may or may not be treated.  Don't sign a consent to treat?  You get treated by no one.     
• Stop being an asshole bully.  That may work with your wife at home or anyone else you come into contact with but remember, I have a degree in passive aggression.  I'll tell you in the nicest, most sincere way to go fuck yourself.  What are you going to do?  Complain?  Go ahead.  Make a complaint.  What are you going to say?  Nothing.  "She was really nice about telling me blah blah blah but I think she may have been rude but I'm not sure because I'm confused because she helped me and I thought I was stupid since she made me feel that way but she was right and now I have what I need..."  I know, it's a massive run on sentence but you get the point. 
• Stop letting your kids run free in public places, unless it's a park and still watch them like hawks. I don't want to hear your kid scream and cry.  For all I know, someone may be kidnapping that child but I think they are a spoiled brat. And............
• FOR GOD'S SAKE.......stop putting your children in pants that have words on the ass.  NO MATTER THEIR AGE...It's disturbing enough to see adults with that crap.  I don't think a six year old should have 'Cutie' or 'Sweet' on the ass of their pants.  Who the fuck would think that was cute?  I know who, just like you do.  I still see that crap and it's been going on for years.  I don't care if it's Victoria's Secret 'Pink' on the ass of a teenager, it's fucked up.    It's a sad paradox if you think about it.

Oh, how I could go on.  I have so much to say...yet life gets in the way sometimes.  My time is limited but my mind is unstoppable.  That is what's on brew bitches.  Just like a fresh pot of coffee first thing in the morning, I'm ready for the day.

So, sit back and think about your imprint you will leave in this world.  What will be your legacy?