So, my new full time job is beyond anything I thought it'd be. The staff is great, the company is great, the doctors and practice manager are awesome. My part time job is what it is. That would be solid entertainment because I make it that way. I've become comfortable enough at my full time job to let them see tiny snippets of how horribly awesome I am and was told for the first time since I'd been there..."Teresa you are in the wrong business." (This was said in a positive manner and I've heard it so many times before).
Will I ever have the nerve to step out and share it with the whole world? Maybe. Life is what you make it. I really think that fear is stopping me more than anything else. Fear of failure. However, there's never been a lesson I haven't learned from failure. Failure of a marriage, failure of birth control, failure of not putting gas in your car when it's on empty. Life has a way of teaching you lessons of what not to do. Maybe it's more that I don't want to hurt people close to me. Actually, let me take that back. Sometimes I'd like to really hurt the people close to me but my mama didn't raise a quitter and I might start and not stop.
Just putting it out there.
Maybe I'll write a book? Nope. Too many people would think it was all true and try to figure out which characters matched up with real people in my life or they'd try to figure out hidden meanings in things like murder scenes and think I want to kill people. I was told by a very wise person once, "Write about what you know and have passion for what you do and you'll go far." I know pain, humor, passion, love, lust, anger, disdain, evil, honor, happiness...
Maybe I'll be a stand up comic? Nope. Too many people would think or I should say KNOW who I'm talking about and get pissed. I mean, you can't hold back when you are dealing with tragic truth turned into humor. I would for real lose people in my life because they'd get all mad because my delivery of life events would bring laughter to others.
Maybe people should start reconsidering being my friends and family to be on the safe side.
So, I think I will write. I will get declined over and over and one day I might just get my book published. Maybe I'll collect my thoughts in a reasonable order and go to an open mic night.
Hell, there's nothing wrong with pissing people off. It seems I do a good job of that without doing any of the above. I need to work on getting passed what others think about it.
Life is what you make it and I say let's make it a party! Get your drink on because you'll need it after you read my book about lust, murder, honor and happiness. Better yet, you'll need it when I'm making fun of you all up on stage and am famous for it.
With that being said...I want to say a big thanks to those who have given me the encouragement I needed and still need. You know who you are and if you don't I'll make a list.
